Choose your (Around the World) Weapon

You’ve made the decision to cut the cord for a year and are ready to circumnavigate the globe at ground level. You’re handed the keys to two vehicles: A kitted out Unimog RV offering all of the comforts of home and a well broken-in, purpose-hardened BMW GS. What do you do?

The debate amongst overland adventurers as to the vehicle best suited to the task of crunching kilometres across every conceivable terrain has raged for years. The chosen tool for the task has cut across the vehicular spectrum ranging from the sublime to the absurd. A Tuk-Tuk, a bicycle, a Suzuki Hayabusa, a London Taxi, a Vespa scooter and a cracked out minvan, to name but a few, have survived to tell the tale.

No judgment can be passed on any of them because each has carved out its own little niche of utility and character. But I think the essence of the debate really comes down to a simple question: two wheels or four? Well, let me count the ways of how the debate leads to a simple result. The answer is two.

 

1. It’s (relatively) portable – I was on my 3^rd straight day at Istanbul airport being led through the catacombs of the dark, dank cargo building by my paid fixer as we worked desperately to get my Triumph Tiger I’d ridden from Los Angeles onto a plane to Kuala Lumpur. When the final bribe had been paid and the last document stamped, all that remained was to get it into the ramp-less building. The diabolical solution was a long, 2” x 10” plank spanning from street level up 1.5 meters to the loading dock. Naturally, riding the 450lb bike up a narrow, flimsy stick of wood was quite terrifying but the angry cargo workers told me to do it or the bike stays in Istanbul. Trousers soiled, the bike was up the ramp and loaded into a container for the Turkish Airlines flight. Try that with a car.
   

   Uncrating the GS at Kathmandu Airport

2. It’s cheap (or can be) – Sure, you can spend USD30k on a kitted out BMW R1250 Adventure and you can spend $500 on an old VW microbus. But odds are the bike you choose will be cheaper to buy, maintain, import, export and fill with fuel. A better return on your adventure investment 9 times out of 10.
3. It’s quite easy to fix – Again here, depending on the machine you select, the difficulty of repair can be comparable. But even with a bike and a car from a similar technological era, the bike wins here simply because there are fewer things to break. Fewer wheel bearings, simpler drive train, fewer suspension components, simpler cooling & lubrication system and two fewer tires to puncture.
   

   Servicing in Shiraz, Iran

4. It provides the exhilaration of risk – There’s no way to mask the reality that motorcyclists are cut from a different cloth. One of the reasons we gravitate toward bikes is the lack of protection and exposure to the elements. The risk of dying is part of what makes us feel alive.
   

   Riding my Bullet in the Thar Desert

5. It connects you with your environment – One of my saddest experiences riding a motorcycle in India was while cruising through the stunning scenery in the Thar Desert on a searingly heat hot day. Surrounded by the beautiful chaos of a swarm of camels and goats at a railway crossing, I peered up into the windows of the bus jostling next to me and saw the faces of plump tourists in their air-conditioned capsule. Sure, they were comfortable, but that’s not the point. I was on my bike as part of the scene. In their tour bus surrounded by a sound and heat-proof buffer of steel and glass, they were merely spectators. The moral here: If you want to experience our world, bust out of your cocoon.
6. It’s agile – Riding my GS one fine day on a dirt track along the Mekong River in Cambodia, I encountered an obstacle. A tributary feeding into the river necessitated negotiating a steep decline, crossing the stream and then scrambling up an incline of similar gradient. The only way out of that ravine was manpower: a half dozen villagers pushing me up the slippery slope spitting off mud from the rear tire like an angry gatling gun. No number of villagers could have managed to push a 2,000kg SUV out of that ditch. Advantage bike.
7. It feels so good – Yes, the grin factor. Do you remember the first time you rode a motorcycle? The first time you did a long road-trip? Your first wheelie? The first time you launched a dirt bike through the air or got your knee down on a racetrack? We ride because it feels good, because it makes us feel free. And no amount top-down driving in a Ford Mustang will ever touch that. As a wise woman once said, four wheels move the body, two wheels move the soul.
8. It connects you with people – In the developing world, ‘two-wheelers’ vastly outnumber cars on the road when you’re outside of cities. Local people you meet while riding down country lanes or when you take breaks in villages will more than likely be motorbike riders and as a result, be naturally curious about the foreigners exploring their part of the world. This is where the magic happens. It’s where the bike creates the connection between you and the people you meet as you explore. And isn’t this why we came in the first place?
   

   Making friends in Rajasthan

Colour me biased; I don’t care. After riding motorcycles through 40 countries and being blockaded by Maoist insurgents at the Nepali border, tracked by the religious police in Iran, escorted by the Pakistani military, lashed by a hurricane in Florida and enveloped in a blizzard in the mountains of eastern Turkey, I’ll surrender my right to comfort, protection and anonymity any day. Give me the bike.

Two Wheeled Expeditions offers adventures through Nepal, India and Sri Lanka.

The first time you fly into Kathmandu you will be amazed by this wonderland! It’s all that you expected and much more. The hustle bustle, the ancient culture and just the sheer number of people going about their business.

You may have landed with the sole purpose of riding a motorcycle or decided to add it to the tail end of your trekking trip. Either way you have some reservations. You recall travel documentaries showing dramatic traffic footage getting in and out of Kathmandu Valley.

Here are 5 tips to make your adventure less stressful and a lot more memorable.

1. Test Ride a day prior to departure

Even a 15 minute ride around your hotel will get you mentally prepared and put you a little more at ease the next morning. Two Wheeled Expeditions does a bicycle tour around the old town before giving you an orientation on the motorcycles.

With the test ride done your questions become clearer as opposed to imagining scenarios from inside a taxi. Most people are surprised by how quickly they adapt to the Nepali traffic.

2. Leave Early | Return on Saturday

You don’t have to leave at the crack of dawn but by 8am you should be crossing past the various roundabouts which will get progressively busy with each passing minute.

If you can choose your day to return into Kathmandu, Saturday is ideal when the city has least amount of traffic. It’s the one weekend day in Nepal.

 

3. Express yourself

Saints, gurus, priests and all those close to achieving Nirvana beware! If you’re the type who has accumulated religious brownie points, this highway is where you lose them. Your dark side will come rushing out as jeeps, trucks, cars and buses will seemingly scrape past you.

Your survival instinct may kick into overdrive and inspite of the Himalayan beauty all around you may only sense the bus hovering right behind you. Time to express yourself and don’t stress yourself.

By the end of the day you will be grinning from ear to ear but at the start you’ll be glad you’re the only one who can hear you inside the helmet.

4. Chia (tea) Thakali (meal) Breaks

Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise but riding a motorcycle burns up calories. How else can you explain the need to stop for tea and meals every hour? Hourly breaks also makes safety sense.

Choose a chia shop or restaurant with more Nepalis and avoid those that are set up for Western tourists. The quality, price and taste are far better in places catering to local travellers. How do you know which ones are which? The local shops usually don’t have menus.

There are enough options on both sides of the road so find one on your left side. This makes getting back into traffic a lot easier.  Frequent stops reduces the stress and you’re able to process and adjust to the rhythm and rules of riding on a Nepali highway.

5. Overtaking

After couple of tea stops and even a plate of ‘Daal-Bhaat’ you’re ready to do what you thought impossible 24 hours earlier. Overtake a bus!

Always expect someone overtaking from the opposite side even on a curve.  Ensure you have a clear view ahead before pulling back that throttle and honking past the bus or truck. This lets the driver know you’re there and they usually slow down to let you go past.

Get used to buses speeding past you and then abruptly stoping to pick up passengers. You will overtake the stationary bus only to have it rumble past you few minutes later. Relax and enjoy the world’s best video game!

Hopefully these five tips will inspire confidence in you to attempt what many presume is too daunting. Test ride, leave early, express yourself, take breaks, overtake and enjoy the beauty and wonder of Nepal!